INFIDELITY/CHEATING IN A RELATIONSHIP

Types of cheating/infidelity in marriage.

Cheating, infidelity, unfaithfulness is a hot, talked about topic these days; it is no more news to anyone.

The problem is that anytime we hear infidelity, cheating or unfaithfulness, our minds goes to the physical act of having sex with the opposite sex other than ones partner, husband or wife. That may be one of it but not all of it.

Infidelity according to the dictionary means;

Lack of religious faith, unbelief, disbelief.

Lack of faith or lack of being constant, especially sexual unfaithfulness.

An act of disloyalty, dishonesty, lying, .

Infidelity/cheating can take on different forms, emotional, physical, material, financial etc.

Infidelity can mean different things to different people, anything that lacks full disclosure be it age, finances, educational qualifications, etc  in any form of relationship can be termed infidelity/cheating.

Sometimes people boast of being faithful, not being the cheating type, thinking that it only takes sex to cheat on ones partner, husband or wife.

1. Material infidelity; when you have a property that your partner, husband or wife is not aware of, or lacks full knowledge about, or has not seen, you are materially unfaithful to your partner, husband or wife. I read a story of a woman who owned a house before marriage, after marriage, she made her husband rent that her property for them, and the man pays the rent to his wife through an agent, this woman may not have had sex with someone else except her husband but she has committed or is committing material infidelity. She has cheated on her husband, she is an unfaithful wife.

2. Financial infidelity; when your partner, husband or wife, does not know how much you earn, how much you worth, you are financially unfaithful to your partner, husband or wife.

There may be good reasons why some people may not want to fully disclose their earnings or salary to their partners, husbands or wives, but still it is financial infidelity. When you hide money up and down in the house so that your partner, husband or wife does not know you have the money, it is financial infidelity. Your salary is 100k and you told your partner, husband or wife, your salary is 50k, it is financial infidelity. When you have some money, and your partner, husband or wife is looking for just a fraction of what you have to solve a problem, you are financially unfaithful to your partner. You may not have had sex with someone else other than your partner, husband or wife, but you are heavily cheating on your partner, husband or wife.

3. Physical infidelity; this is now the physical act of having sex with someone else other than ones partner, husband or wife. A scholar once said that infidelity happens in the mind first before it graduates to the physical act of having sex. So many cases of adultery were well thought out in the mind before it metamorphoses into the physical act of having sex.

4. Emotional infidelity; this is the most common and easily practiced type of infidelity/cheating. People indulge in this type of infidelity unknowingly, or should I say unconsciously. With this new generation of mobile phones, data, internet and chatting, it is so very easy to commit emotional infidelity.

This type of infidelity usually starts casually and often poses no threat initially or tends to be harmless, but it is very dangerous.

You probably have a need to share your problem with someone. May be marital, emotional, financial, family, social, work related, etc, and you remember that your online friend who is always ready to listen to you and give you attention.

When your spouse is unavailable either due to absence from home or there is an ongoing fight/quarrel in the home, and you need someone to talk to, then the opposite sex friend offers you a listening ear, a shoulder to lean on, if this opposite sex friend happens to have the same problem, the friendship bond strengthens in no time.

When you begin to reveal your partners, husband’s or wife’s weaknesses to the opposite sex friend, you are committing emotional infidelity, and it may now be time to take things up to physical infidelity, sex and you may find yourself in bed with the opposite sex friend.

With or without sex involved, emotional infidelity is dangerous to any marriage as it makes you emotionally unavailable to our partner, husband or wife.

When you start telling your opposite sex friend what you are supposed to be telling your partner, husband or wife, you are emotionally unfaithful to your partner, husband or wife.

You spend long hours talking on the phone, gisting, chatting with your opposite sex friend you are emotionally unfaithful to your partner, husband or wife. When you delete text messages so your partner, husband or wife does not see it, you are on your way to emotional infidelity.

When you lock your phone with a password unknown to your partner, husband or wife, you are already committing emotional infidelity.

When you start comparing your partner, husband or wife to your opposite sex friend, you are committing emotional infidelity.

When you are always alone with the opposite sex friend gisting, you may start getting attached to him/her which may give rise to emotional infidelity and consequently physical infidelity, sex.

You may say, I have self control, I know what I’m doing, well, I rest my case.

Did I miss any type of cheating, infidelity, or unfaithfulness? Please tell me more about it in the comment box.

Do you have any observations to make or point out? Feel free and use the comment box. Criticisms are most welcome.

TILL I HAVE GIST FOR YOU AGAIN…………..

STAY HAPPY ALWAYS………..